Estimated Reading Time: 5 minutes
By Melanie Lockwood Herman
“When the road looks rough ahead, and you’re miles and miles from your nice warm bed… you just remember what your old pal said, ‘Boy, you’ve got a friend in me.’” – You’ve Got a Friend In Me, by Randy Newman (from the movie Toy Story)
In her article titled, “Do Your Friends Actually Like You,” Houston-based journalist Kate Murphy explores the fascinating subject of friendship. Citing research indicating that “only about half of perceived friendships are mutual,” and through interviews with friendship experts, Murphy artfully explores the means and meaning of friendship.
Several insights from the article seem especially compelling and potentially useful for those of us focused on the intersection of human behavior and risk in nonprofit workplaces. I finished the article with four specific insights that I believe have wonderful relevance for leaders committed to creating best-in-class, risk-aware workplaces.
According to psychologist Robin I.M. Dunbar, our limited time and emotional capital means that we may only have ‘five slots’ for truly intense friendships. His research includes the identification of layers of friendship: from very close, intimate friends, to casual friends in which we invest minimal energy, to acquaintances.
Although the take-away from Dunbar’s comment is that none of us has the capacity to have more than a few, close friends, another lesson is that workplace friendships require an ongoing investment. We can all be a little more thoughtful about how we invest our emotional capital, as well as our risk management efforts.
Resource:
“Do Your Friends Actually Like You?” By Kate Murphy, The New York Times, August 6, 2016
Melanie Lockwood Herman is Executive Director of the Nonprofit Risk Management Center. She welcomes your feedback about this article and friendship at Melanie@nonprofitrisk.org or 703.777.3504.
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